sample admission essay

Essay (first paragraph)

My educational attainment and work experience have made me a competent professional, but my commitment and reliability are what makes my academic background and professional attainment more valuable. I was able to obtain a bachelor’s degree in Commerce at the __________, and for three years, I was able to attain top ranking in class. In terms of work experience, I’ve had a three year-experience working for ___________ New Delhi and now I am one of their technical assistants. This length of experiences has equipped me with the needed knowledge and competency in the business and accounting field. I believe that obtaining an MBA degree will help me further my career and allow me to meet my educational as well as professional goals. My dedication to my chosen profession will help me make worthwhile contributions in the field, and with an MBA degree, I will have the added qualifications to show for it.

outline

I.  Essay question

By answering the essay question regarding my career goals and how a ______ MBA can help me achieve them, I believe I am able to show the admissions officers how this graduate degree is highly relevant for both my personal and professional advancement. Furthermore, by pursuing an MBA degree, I believe I can make a valuable contribution to the commerce and accounting industry of India. The essay question allowed me to showcase my qualifications both academically and professionally.

II.  My qualifications

I believe that my educational background and work experience only prove my commitment to continued growth and success in the field.  My qualifications include the following:

1.  Attaining a bachelor’s degree in Commerce at the _____________ in India
2.  Sustain top ranking in class
3.  Being a final group student of the Institute of the Chartered Accountants of India under the Chartered Accountancy (CA) course (to be completed in May)
4.  Having worked for three years for PriceWaterhouse, New Delhi in the assurance and business advisory services division
5.  Working as a Technical Assistant with the same division since the past four months

III. MBA application

1. Explain concisely why an MBA degree is well-suited for me
2. Show how my training and scholastic experience in Commerce and Accountancy makes me a suitable applicant for an MBA degree
3. Show how I can make relevant contributions to my workplace by pursuing further studies in MBA
4. Explain why I want to specialize in international and portfolio management

The following is a free sample admission essay based on information a reader of this blog sent in.  Want a free sample essay?  Email us for a FREE essay and outline today.

My favorite Indian proverb translates: “Don’t just cross a river — cross it bearing fire!”  To me, these simple yet powerful words speak not only of a journey, but also of purpose, preparation, and pioneering–three tenets that I believe should be at the heart of every endeavor in life.  Today, I am face-to-face with the journey toward my aspirations of becoming one of the best healthcare providers in my home country, India.

When I left my small home town to study for college in one of India’s mega cities, I had a purpose.  My purpose was to take up Homeopathy at one of the country’s leading universities.  I learned about various aspects of homeopathic healthcare, a line of study that coincides well with my dream of offering widespread and affordable healthcare through homeopathic practices.  The study and practice of homeopathy also synergizes well with my interest in Indian philosophy and my passion for Indian culture.  Although I studied to become a homeopathy doctor, much of my practice since graduating from college has been in the line of allopathy.  In fact, I worked as an intern in a allopathic clinic, where I was able to interact with many people and educate them about the benefits of homeopathy.

Now, I seek to prepare myself for my journey toward becoming a homeopathic healthcare provider in India, crossing “the river” from India to America, where I intend on taking up an MBA in Healthcare from ________ College.  I believe that ________ College has great educational values and a diverse student body, truly an educational institution where I can learn a lot from both faculty and student interactions.  I also believe that I can make quite a significant contribution in classroom discussions, case studies, and debates through my unique perspective because of my background, upbringing, education, interests, and experiences.

I am not only an Indian woman with a bachelor’s degree in Homeopathy, but I am also going to be the first generation in my family to study in the United States.  I am married to an Indian computer professional who is working in the US on an H1 Visa.  We both enjoy closely following the political and economic changes caused by the phenomenal growth of India, the “Asian Tiger.”  When I first thought of moving from India to America, I was rather apprehensive, because I was unsure about how my career would be affected by the move.  After extensive research and careful consideration, however, I truly feel that ________ College can give me the best healthcare administration schooling and the best preparation to attain my goals in life.

In a decade, I envision myself back in India, working as the managing director of a pharmaceutical company or a health maintenance organization.  After gaining extensive experience with such companies and organizations, my dream is to become a pioneer by founding a hospital that will provide a wide variety of homeopathic and traditional medicine services at an affordable price.

Beyond my career aspirations, I also want to become a pioneer in my parent’s eyes, to make them proud of my being the first generation to “cross the river… bearing fire,” and finding success in my migration.  On the subject of family, I also aspire to be the best wife and mother I can be.  I wish to provide my future children with the best upbringing and education possible, that one day they may become the next generation to have an inspired purpose, to study abroad and seek proper preparation, and to become pioneers in their own right.  I believe that pursuing and earning my MBA education from ________ College will set me on the right path to reaching all of my goals and aspirations.

OUTLINE FOR THIS ESSAY
I. Indian proverb: “Don’t just cross a river — cross it bearing fire!”

a.  Explaining meaning
b.  Purpose, preparation, pioneering
c.  Journey toward healthcare

II.  Explaining my purpose

a.  Background and education
i.  From small town to mega city
ii.  Bachelor’s degree in Homeopathy

b.  Practical experience
i.   Allopathy
ii.  Educating and interacting with people

III.  Eplaining the journey and preparation

a.  MBA in Healthcare from _____ College
i.  educational values
ii.  diverse student body
iii.  will give proper preparation for future

b.  What I have to offer ________

i.  Indian woman versed in homeopathy
ii.  Follow news on Asian Tiger
iii.  Married to computer professional
iv. 1st generation to study abroad
v.  apprehension of moving (career)

IV.  Toward the future and becoming a pioneer

a.  Career
i.  Managing director (pharma or HMO)
ii.  Founding hospital

b.  Family
i.   Make parents proud
ii.  Be a good wife and parent
iii.  Dreams for children

c.  MBA from __________

Crafting the perfect MBA application essay is a tough job.  Many people are aware of the benefits an MBA degree can give them in their careers and as such, you need to be able to stand out in the kind of admission essays that you pass.  MBA schools have doubled their strictness when it comes to choosing prospective students, taking in applicants who impress not only with their grades but also with the achievements in their lives.  Get inspiration and ideas on how to define entrepreneurship in your MBA admission essay by viewing sample MBA essays.  Here’s how to make your own winning piece from the good points seen in sample MBA admission essays.

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Getting into the MBA school of your choice can be quite challenging.  Not only do you have to have reasonable grades to get admitted into a good MBA school, but you are also expected to write MBA admission essays.  Most schools have specific questions or topics for you to answer in your MBA essay, such as “what is your career vision?” or “how have you engaged with a community or organization?”(1)  Whether or not the school you are applying to has specific essay questions or topics, it can still be difficult to go about writing your MBA admissions essays.  One of the best areas to focus on in your MBA essays is your entrepreneurial endeavors.  Here are some tips on how to write about and develop topics of entrepreneurship and professional experience in your MBA essays:

MBA essay questions: know what to expect

Before you get started with your MBA essays, it’s important to have a good idea of what admissions committees expect from you and your essays.  First, check out the admissions requirements of the school you are applying to and make sure that you know exactly what questions or topics they expect you to write about in the essay.  Some schools require multiple essays, each one answering a different question.  While some essay questions will ask specifically about your career life or professional experience, others will focus on more general topics.(2)

Try to take a look at the questions independently and collectively to get an idea of what the admissions committee is expecting of you.  For example, some questions may be more centered on values and virtues, while others are focused on achievements and success.(3)  Knowing what to expect and knowing what is expected of you will help you set clear and precise goals for your MBA admission essays.

Looking at sample MBA essays with the theme of entrepreneurship: getting ideas from an MBA essay sample about how to develop the topic of entrepreneurship

Now that you have a basic idea of what to write about in your MBA essays, you may want to gather information and ideas on how to successfully develop the theme of entrepreneurship in your essay.  Perhaps the best way to begin your research is by reading sample MBA essays of those who have been successful in getting into the business school of their choice.  You can find sample essays from numerous sources, such as co-workers, friends, and relatives.  Aside from asking those around you, consider using the Internet to search for sample MBA essays.  In fact, some websites have listings of sample application essays submitted to particular MBA schools.(4)

When you locate some useful sample MBA essays with the entrepreneurship theme, make sure to take note of how they developed the theme.  What types of endeavors does the sample mention? Did the writer use a creative or unique angle to express his or her ideas? You will probably notice that many of the successful MBA essays based on a theme of entrepreneurship are those that go beyond a simple enumeration of the writer’s achievements, endeavors, and successes.  Try to get ideas of what to write about and how to express it successfully.(5)

Writing about your business or entrepreneurial endeavors in your MBA admission essays

When writing your MBA essay, make sure to keep in mind the form and substance of your essay.  The form is how the MBA essay is written and organized.  It is important to effectively convey your message, while keeping your essay concise and coherent.  The substance of your essay, while focusing on your entrepreneurial endeavors, should also speak for some of the values and virtues that you have learned along the way.

Possible topic #1: Stating in your MBA admissions essay how an MBA degree can further help your business

You may want to start by writing about some of the business experience that you have gained throughout the years.  Remember that the admission resume already serves as a list of your achievements, so try to focus on only one or two of your experiences in entrepreneurship.  You may want to give a little background, but make sure to keep your focus on how an MBA degree can help you with your current entrepreneurial ventures.  Try to explain why you think it’s the right time for you to get an MBA degree in the context of your business.  Finally, you may want to conclude your MBA essay with a few sentences about what you plan to do once you complete your MBA education.(6)

Possible topic #2: Indicating in your MBA admissions essays how an MBA degree can equip you with skills to finally start your own business

MBA admission essays can make or break your chances of getting accepted into the MBA school of your choice, so be sure to take the time and effort to write excellent essays.  Indicating in your essay how an MBA degree can help you establish your own business is another good topic.  By using this as a topic, you’re actually letting the admissions officers know about your future goals as a first-time entrepreneur.

Remember that writing an essay will not only help you convince the admissions committee to accept you, but it will also be a great way of reflecting upon your success, career, and life in general.  Writing an MBA admission essay may seem like a daunting task at first, but, with a little inspiration and motivation, you can write an excellent essay that can get you in the MBA school of your choice.

(1) http://www.hbs.edu/mba/admissions/writtenapplication.html
(2) http://www.admissionsessays.com/business_school.html
(3) http://www.fuqua.duke.edu/programs/duke_mba/daytime/apply_daytime/
(4) http://www.businessweek.com/bschools/mbainsider/sample_essays.html
(5) http://www.sampleadmissionessay.com
(6) http://businessmajors.about.com/od/admissionessays/

Question:  Why is an MBA a critical next step toward your short- and long-term career goals? Why is ___ University the best MBA program for you?

One of the many reasons why an MBA is a critical next step toward my short- and long-term career goals is that I have a strong desire to improve the management system and business operations of my parents’ medium-sized company, which is a retail shop selling books and school and office supplies. Ever since I graduated from college, I have been seriously involved in my parents’ company, after all, I was a Management major and enjoy business a lot. After several years of closely assisting my parents make big and small business decisions, I have a full understanding of what our company is capable of. Now, I strongly believe that, without a better education, we will be ill-equipped to tap into the many lucrative opportunities that are present at our doorstep. It would be such a waste to miss out on such opportunities, especially now that we have established a strong reputation of our business in our city.

Another reason I believe that an MBA is a critical next step for my career goals is that, based on a personal principle, one should not rest on his or her laurels too early in life. I am young, optimistic, and have so much more to learn. I want to make the most out of my life and to experience as many eye-opening moments as possible. I studied from a very good college, but I refuse to believe that my learnings and experiences back in college represent the limit of what I can do. But more than what I can do for myself, I want to do something for the many people who need help and education.

Having an MBA from ____ University is a privilege that not many people may enjoy. Many are in poverty and do not even have the means to buy bread and decent clothing. But, women like me who come from families who can afford pleasures must take advantage and make the most of what we have. I am one of the women who been given the privilege of a better education and I will use this privilege to help improve the lives of our workers and other people eventually.

Finally, I wish to pursue an MBA because I want to provide a life that my future family will enjoy. I want my children to enjoy the best schools and to keep working for the best. I also want my children to grow up being responsible and generous toward others. So, to accomplish all of my goals, I need an MBA from ___ University, which will help me be successful financially and personally.

The MBA program offered by ____ University focuses on meeting global standards and introduces new business perspectives. These standards and perspectives will help business women like me face business challenges in a more enlightened view and to implement solutions that are more helpful and effective. Finally, an MBA from ___ University will help business leaders to participate in the global business arena with greater confidence and a more profound life perspective.

Photo credits:  mindluge

I learned all about true leadership through my high school’s cheerleading team. Even if, at first, I only wanted to be in the team to become one of the “It-girls,” the challenges that the team encountered showed me that there is more in being a popular cheer leader. One becomes popular because she has to lead her teammates, the football team and the whole school to share in strong camaraderie and support one another. A cheerleader should be able to influence others with a strong school spirit, no matter what happens.

On top of establishing and keeping school camaraderie, my cheer leading team had to do a lot of preparations for the annual cheer leading championships. After school hours, we spent much time practicing and improving our choreography and overall presentation. Discouragement often presented itself to us, but I, as the head cheer leader, continued to give hope to my team. I believed that every situation can be an opportunity if only you look at it in such manner.

Moving on to college, I turned to more serious preoccupations like the student council. While intensely involved in my studies in marketing and public relations, I managed to be the head of the student council. I worked closely with different students and college professors and honed my interpersonal skills. I learned how to listen to what others had to say and to tell them my side in the most straightforward but gentle manner. I was also able to establish various changes in school including more orderly and efficient career fairs and more diverse and interesting extra-curricular activities that can prepare students for the working life.

Going through high school and college changed my perspective of life. I learned how to be outgoing and to contribute to the improvement and benefit of others more than mine. Now, I am getting ready for greater challenges.

I have been working in my father’s PR firm since college graduation and, eventually, I am going to inherit the company. Our PR firm has also been one of the best during the past 10 years and I still want to improve it. But to be better equipped, I will need an MBA from ___ university. Having such education will help me to understand how to keep up in an industry that is fueled by competition and realistic foresight.

I realize, however, that staying ahead of others is no easy task. Running an entire company is not much like managing a cheer leading team or a student council either. Nevertheless, despite whatever major obstacles  I will have to face, I remain optimistic as I have always been. I am very confident that I will not just benefit much from my studies but also be able to surpass problems using everything that I have learned.

Photo credits:  Terren in Virginia

Throughout college, I had found myself in many situations where I could turn challenges into opportunities. As a member of the women’s basketball team and co-founder of an environmental awareness organization in my college, I faced many challenges. One of these challenges was balancing my grades with my extracurricular activities. There was a time when my grades suffered as a result of the struggle I had in balancing my work load in school, sports, and organizations I was involved in. During this time, I had made a crucial decision in my life. Rather than seeing all of these stressful situations as challenges, I would invite them into my life as opportunities to better myself and those around me. While this was a tension-filled time in my life, I took away from it an essential life lesson, which has served me well ever since. Earning an MBA is another challenge that I am passionate about turning into an opportunity.

Having majored in Marketing back in college, achieving an MBA is the next step to fulfilling my aspirations of running an environment-friendly office supply manufacturing company. This future plan has influenced many of the decisions I have made in life, such as the organization to which I am co-founder and the job I entered into after college. Currently, I am working as a Sales Promotion Executive with a large office supply retailer. In this job, I have been presented with many more challenges, which I have turned into opportunities for success. Being a Sales Promotion Executive has given me the experience and background I need to pursue my aspirations. Likewise, my experience as a member of the women’s basketball team and as co-founder of a college organization has instilled in me leadership and teamwork qualities that are valuable to my job and life in general. Still, I have a longing to expand my capabilities even further. This is why I have decided upon entering into an MBA program, which will give me the much-needed edge in experience, training and values-building for achieving my goals.

I am proud of the many challenges that I have turned into opportunities. Beyond this, however, I am even more proud of the many opportunities that I have turned into successes. Still, I am enthusiastic to apply my leadership qualities, teamwork skills and dedicated personality to much more in life – such as an MBA program.  ________ University has just the right MBA curriculum to equip me with the education, training and experience I need to achieve my goals. In other words, the MBA program offered by ______ University is another challenge that I would like to make a success.